Cynically Spectral: Opening Myself Up to Auras [And All Other Things Metaphysical]

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Original post written on June 26, 2019.


That afternoon more than seven years ago was all I could think about last night as I finally took the plunge and decided to see if I could read my parents’ auras.

I was so nervous.

In fact, I’ve been anxious about my spiritual abilities from the moment I started to realize I just might have (which, it turns out, I do) them over a decade ago.  I did my utmost to push them away for years using weapons such as doubt, logic, anger, fear, and earthly devices.  All I really succeeded at doing, however, was slowing them down.

That’s why slowly opening myself up to my abilities over the past few months through the comfort of two, brand new tarot decks has been one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever done.  Countering my doubts, disbelief, and earthly darkness has also been extremely challenging; it’s a process in itself.

Then, five days ago, I entered what has been a slowly deepening phase of increased intuition, awareness, and spiritual advancement.  I won’t pretend I haven’t tried to resist it; it’s a habit I’m trying to break, as much as it frightens me to do so.  However, I’ve done my utmost over the past few days to let my newfound willingness persevere.  And, with each day that passes, it’s getting easier.  I’m slowly beginning to trust the goodness of this divine strangeness in a manner similar to how I trust Prabhu (God) himself.

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On Thestrals and Death

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Original piece written on July 1st, 2019.

I can finally see the thestrals.

Even though I was an avid lover of the Harry Potter series throughout my early childhood and teenage years, I never gave thestrals, the characters they concerned, nor the implications of their attributes much serious thought…

That is, until today, when I watched my grandmother pass away before my very eyes.

thestral gifFor those of you who are unfamiliar with thestrals, they are fictional, mythical creatures from the Harry Potter book [and movie] series, first introduced in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.  J.K. Rowling wrote them such that a person can only see them once they’ve watched someone else die.

These creatures are portrayed as being “spooky” and “grotesque” in aesthetic, yet kind and gentle in nature.  More importantly, Rowling conceptualized “the thestral” with the intent of it existing as a living, breathing, beautiful, and mythological symbol of Death.

Despite the fact that I’ve had my issues with her in recent years (both with her behavior as an author and a human being), even I have to acknowledge that she accomplished something pretty spectacular here with her invention of the thestrals.

You see, I realize now that with a few clever flicks of her quill, J.K. Rowling fashioned a species whose magic and importance extends beyond the pages of her books, and deep into the real world of her readers.

In the same way her fictional characters could only see thestrals after witnessing Death firsthand, Rowling’s readers can only truly understand them after experiencing that same, painful phenomenon. 

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Baby Vamp Officially Goes Metaphysical

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My religion and spirituality are very dear to me.

They’ve helped forged my best and most redeeming qualities, and they’ve been there for me during the darkest periods of my life.  I strongly believe they will continue to provide me support and guidance as I trek upon the path which lays ahead in my current birth.

medium blogRegardless, I never spoke much about these topics; they were suppressed beneath several, matted layers of disbelief and fear

That is, until quite recently.

Don’t get me wrong: my reservations were never because I lack confidence in Prabhu/God, but rather, because I struggle to have faith in myself.

I’ve grappled for a long time with my supposed spiritual capabilities… More so, the question of whether I actually have them.

No matter how much proof God gave me that they exist, I always found ways to cloud, deny, and avoid the larger truth I didn’t want to face.

I only ever wanted God.  Nevertheless, I also received a set of mystical abilities which refuse to let me elude them.

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